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The Man Apple

Watch out for the `Lady Boys` he kept telling me. When I was in San Francisco with Ben on my way to fly out of Portland we met a friend of Ben`s girlfriend`s friend and former roommate (follow?) who kept saying over and over watch out for the Lady Boys when you get to Thailand. I`ve been in Thailand for almost exactly 24 hours and they are EVERYWHERE. And I have to tell you if I didn`t have such an well traveled head on my shoulders I might really be freaking out. In fact I might just freak out anyway!

I`m sure someone reading this is going to tell me to have an `open mind` or to be a little more `culturally understanding`. Yeah yeah yeah, whatever. I don`t think I`m backin down from this one. You`re just walking through this wonderful market enjoying yourself, when a Thai girl smiles at you as you walk by her shop. You pause look at the little wooden elephant carving look back up and BOOM! (What THE?!?)there is this big ol`Man Apple sticking out of that same Thai girl`s throat.

I`ll admit it, I like girls, and I like liking girls. I know there are guys that like guys and girls girls, but let`s at least be honest with each other. I mean I think it`s fair that we know just who (or what) is smiling at who? Am I wrong? Don`t get me wrong, it hasn`t happened yet (at least that I know of) but what when you are walking down the street minding your own business and you think to yourself, "Now she`s an attractive....(screeeeech!) dude? Not cool. I get the heebies just thinking of it.

All I am proposing is some sort of system that says "Hi, I am a guy." Ok? Ok.

Other than that cultural confusion Thailand so far is great. It is true, the food is unmatched. Even a little Pad Thai in the mall for lunch will get you excited for dinner. It is certainly more warm and sweaty but not as bad as I was expecting. I spent one full day in Bangkok and just this afternoon took a bus to, um... well you wouldnt understand me if I did know how to spell it, but it`s where the bridge over River Kwae is. And in the next two days I plan to take my new Tiger excitement to "Tiger Temple" where the monks actually let you take pictures with the tigers!!! Then after that, I have a full day set aside for an authentic Thai cooking course, where by the end of the day I should have 6 solid dishes down Pad. Get it?...Like Pad Thai... the dish...

Oh man, I`m awesome.

posted by Travelin' D @ 8:29 AM